This and That

April 27, 2011

A Husband’s perspective on CSA

Filed under: emotions, kids, Rant — Tags: , , — yaadayaada @ 9:58 am

This is a guest post by Yaadayaada’s husband! This post is not moderated or seen by yaadayaada as yet!!

This one is for you yaada yaada!! I will always love and support you.

I have been reading some of the blogs posted as a part of CSA Awareness month. So I thought I will write my first blog as a means
of expressing my support and solidarity for this cause and also as the smallest possible thing I can give my wife yaadayaada who
has been a victim of this.

As a kid I have been completely impervious and fortunately away from such monstrosity!! These people who dare do such acts of
depravity are not human beings. Even animals do not stoop down to such levels. So there is no place in the living world for such

Unfortunately I am not as tolerant and I can’t turn a blind eye to this. So I often argue with yaadayaada that she should confront
the person who dared to abuse her! But I respect her decision and her argument that it should be the abuser who should be
ashamed and feel bad about it.

I am the kind of person who sees a lot of things in black and white. I know the real world is not that way. But I still feel that it will
give me a closure if I can confront such horrible people. Granted they most likely will not face it or accept it. But if I feel it gives me
a closure, I will not hesitate to do this. This does not work for every person who is abused and they will have to deal with it the way
they feel right.

I dont want to talk about what we can do to prevent it, as I feel there are lots of people here who have given multiple opinions on
that matter and I completely agree with all of them. I don’t think I can add anything more in this aspect.

All I want to say is, I cannot describe the feeling of disgust I have for such folks! I have always felt so damn helpless when we
(yaadayaada and I) talk about this topic. I feel that we can never come to conclusion on what can be done to prevent or to confront
people who do this (especially when the people who do such things are in your trusted circle). I would treat them (left to me) no
different than a person who would have been a stranger in this case. All I can do is to listen to her(yaadayaada) and feel bad and
sorry for the fact that she had to go through it.

So husbands or spouses, please be supportive to all folks who have been victims and give them their space so that they can deal
with it the way they feel best. This is the least that we can do for our loved ones.

Always, be on the lookout for suspicious activity even if it is not your own child or kid. Hopefully we can at least make such devils think
that they are alway being watched. If it was left to me I will create a bulletin board and put the photographs of every such monster
and publish it for the world to see and criticize. This applies to friends and family as well, not just strangers who do this. In my
opinion, if a person can stoop down to such level, they cease to be friend or a family to me. I don’t even want to be unknowingly
talking and socializing with them.

My heart felt sympathies to all those who had to go through this. I cannot even begin to describe my feelings against such lowly
souls of the society! If there is anything at all I can do to help this awareness spread I will be more than happy to give a helping

Thanks to whoever started this and to all the folks who have taken the time to write their opinions on this topic.

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